Paris Hilton bulimic?

June 10th, 2007

Shrinks at the Twin Towers jail psych ward have reported that Paris Hilton may be bulimic and could have carefully hidden her addition to self-purging for over a decade.
The petulant heiress has spent two nights under 24 hour observation in a closely-monitored ward where her bodily fluid samples were analysed after traces of both emetics and laxatives proved to be the only substances other than nicotine, alcohol and cocaine in her system.
“She’s been making herself sick for some years now in a bid to keep the pounds off her ass,” sources close to the jail’s toxicology department said today.
“Purging and substance-abuse bingeing are frequently major contributory factors to a toxic personality that only thrives on feelgood hormones which constant attention provides.
“Treatment usually necessitates complete retro-engineering of body and soul.
“We have the former and are now on the lookout to see if the lady has any of the latter before a course of treatment can begin.”